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Top Ten Rules and Regulations for
Podiatric Residents
By
Jay
Lieberman, DPM
1
Read "The House of God" twice before you start your program.
2
Never
admit to having any free time. The answer to the question, "How
is your day"? Is always, I'm swamped. I'll probably be here
until midnight.
3
Be suspicious of creative stews in the hospital cafeteria,
particularly if you cannot identify the protein contained
within.
4
Mishiganosis is not a medical diagnosis. It is an alert to turf
this patient to a fellow resident.
5
The Otis elevator is not an improved version of McGlammry’s
device. It cannot be found in central supply.
6
There
is a myth that restraints are used to prevent older patients
from injuring themselves. Although these people are often seen
weakened or incapacitated, they are cagey and stronger than they
seem. They tend to attack areas of the body, which are covered
with hair.
7
A finger Cot is only for the Brave of heart. I recommend
covering all five fingers and the majority of the hand and
wrist.
8
The patient who informs you they are allergic to all Non-steroidals,
Talwin, Darvocet, Tylenol, Demoral, Lorcet, Vicodin, Codeine,
Panlor, Ultram, Medrol and Percocet, but responds quite well to
oxycontin; is probably not sincere, particularly if they are
requesting analgesic relief from tinea pedis.
9
An
Austin Bunionectomy probably should not be dictated as seven
separate procedures.
10
Find
other things to do when you hear- the following:
-
How in
God’s name did it get in there?
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Yeah, it’s
probably an anaerobe
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My
daughter has no plans for Saturday night.
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“Where is
that 1st year guy?”
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Who can
first assist on that perforated bowel?
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